Worldwide

Jimmy Kimmel Brutally Roasts Ted Cruz for Twitter Porn Video Mishap

Jimmy Kimmel Brutally Roasts Ted Cruz for Twitter Porn Video Mishap”

"Which is.well, he's a family values guy", the comedian joked on Tuesday's Jimmy Kimmel Live.

"The video is from a genre known as stepmom porn". But he doesn't really believe Cruz, hater of dildos, is responsible. "Just think: if only he'd done something this perverted during the campaign, he might be president right now".

Ted lost the presidential election. He also got in a shot at President Donald Trump. He's exhausted of being the uptight religious guy.

Kimmel then went through the possible scenarios of what could have happened.

Kimmel took issue with Cruz's explanation that it was a "staffing issue" and a "mistake", but felt it probably wasn't the senator who "liked" the porn because ultimately to his thinking "Ted Cruz masturbates to pictures of poor people without health care". "'Ew, gross, ' said the porn stars after hearing that Ted Cruz watched them", he joked.

"This is not how I envisioned waking up this morning", Cruz said. He wasn't referring to Apple's new iPhone X, however.

Kimmel then released a hilarious "Ted Cruz SuperPAC" ad that tried to throw cold water on the notion Cruz looks like "like a man who watches porn on his phone".

"Here's the thing though: Everyone is freaking out about this, saying it is a scandal all because a politician may have watched porn", Noah said. "It's part of being a normal human being, which is exactly why we know Ted Cruz didn't do it", he continued". "He's pretending to like porn in order to blend it with the rest of the human species".



Like this

Latest


13 September 2017
Pep leaves out Toure for 'sporting reasons'
But Guardiola warned that his side are still a work in progress. "I'm always happy, but of course I demand as much as possible". That was eventually resolved, with Toure not only winning back his place but doing enough to earn a new contract.

13 September 2017
Analyst Stock Ratings: Validus Holdings, Ltd. (VR), Bristow Group Inc. (BRS)
The transaction was disclosed in a legal filing with the Securities & Exchange Commission, which is available through this link . Finally, ValuEngine raised Validus Holdings from a "hold" rating to a "buy" rating in a research note on Saturday, June 3rd.

13 September 2017
Potash Corporation of Saskatchewan (NYSE:POT) Given Media Sentiment Rating of 0.27
First Eagle Investment Management Llc bought 930,317 shares as the company's stock declined 11.27% while stock markets rallied. The stock of Potash Corporation of Saskatchewan (USA) (NYSE:POT) has "Hold" rating given on Tuesday, May 31 by Stifel Nicolaus.

13 September 2017
Jaguar Land Rover Racing Ahead With Electrification at Frankfurt Motor Show
The Discovery SVX will be the first Land Rover assembled by hand at the SVO Technical Centre when production begins in 2018. But then again, they do have Land Rover as one of their focuses - and that only means better off-road chops.

13 September 2017
U.S. warns China, Russia must comply with sanctions on North Korea
Trump has repeatedly refused to rule out using a military strike to take out some of North Korea's nuclear facilities. Chinese Ambassador Liu Jieyi again called for talks "sooner rather than later".

13 September 2017
McConnell pours cold water on Trump-Schumer effort to repeal debt ceiling
Those trips, along with the Tuesday dinner, are part of efforts to pressure Donnelly to support a tax overhaul, the aide said. Trump administration officials have nonetheless said they'd prefer to seek bipartisan support for a tax bill.

13 September 2017
England to face New Zealand in 2018
Japan will play England for the just the second time in a full test match on November 17, 2018, the Japan Rugby Football Union announced Wednesday.

13 September 2017
First Brexit hurdle is cleared
It'll now face days of line-by-line scrutiny while both Conservative and Labor lawmakers attempt change it. A major Brexit bill just passed its first big test - but not without criticism.

13 September 2017
Pochettino urges Spurs to make fast start against Dortmund
It's their first visit to the national stadium since the 2013 Champions League defeat to Bayern Munich. I think we have to do better at home, and that's something we've got to learn from this year.

13 September 2017
McCain to North Korea: Aggression will lead to 'extinction'
Putin has remained firm however that such sanctions on oil would have negative humanitarian effects on North Koreans. DPRK is short for North Korea's official name, the Democratic People's Republic of Korea.



Recommended